I hear you loud n clear

Because Emily and John requested this one and it is one of my personal favorites we just have to do it. It looks like this is turning into an infomercial commentary more than just commercials but I'll try to mix it up. First lets hope you have all seen this one. You can watch it down below if you need to refresh your memory. Apparently this thing makes you a mind reader. When the lady yells out BINGO! she gets all excited before the guy even calls out the number. She starts flapping her arms and has that face like, " everyone look at me." She then is at a game of cards and is acting like she's the hot new chick in town. When she leans over to ask what trump was, her cards are showing and the guy say, "hearts" with his eyes checking out her hand. So it also makes you oblivious. Then the same lady is in church not listening to a sermon mind you but rather an entire congregation signing. Wow this lady really is deaf. I think I'm going to go to church with a blue tooth headset from now, it's just the new thing to do and it looks cool. If you notice the guy sitting behind the lady in church is the same cheater from the card game, and he's not signing. He actually has a smirk on his face probably because he made $50 bucks off the idiot in front of him. Now lets discuss the lady bringing in groceries while her neighbors talk about her husband and family. They say, "they just got another new car, he must be doing really well." The lady shakes her head like, "You have no idea, you stupid *$#^#@*. (Sorry for the swearing)
Lets be realistic. What do you think those ladies really said? "The Rogers just got a new car, who do they think they are trying to impress in this economy?, I bet her husband is cheating on her and his taxes." Who want's to hear that. Because that is what people say when their neighbor rolls up in a new ride. Another interesting point is when the moms are talking at the park and the little girl says, "wait for me." First her voice kills me every time, second if the mom has the device on for hearing her child from far away, how loud is the conversation she's having with her the other mom? Have you ever been to a party where you are the new guy/gal? Isn't it awkward when your standing by yourself with your blue tooth on just nodding to nobody. So these girls are talking about him and he's nodding like, "I am really cute. These girls know what's up." So after he introduces himself to the girls and they ask why he has his Blue tooth in his ear, what is he supposed to say? "UHHHH, this is actually a super sonic listening device to eavesdrop at parties." Or, " UHHHHH, This isn't a phone." Or, "I am expecting a call so I thought I would just rome the party with my phone in my ear." Lose/lose situation don't you think? Apparently the guy at his sons baseball game didn't realize that over a hundred years ago the guys who invented the game created hand signals that indicate whether a player is safe or out. This was invented so that people who are 200 feet away know what just took place. But if you really want to hear what the guy said just to make sure his hand motions and his mouth are on the same page you should definitely have one of these things to verify.

LoudNClear

Get me one!

I recently pulled all the muscles in my lower back because my wallet was so full. I hope none of you ever have to go through this painful experience. Having so much cold hard cash in my back pocket can really be a bummer. So I really need someone to get me the SLIM CLIP. In the commercial there is a guy who takes out his wallet and it is so full of cash that it flew out all over the place. If your biggest problem is that you have cash raining all around you because you have so much of it then life must be just awful. Then there is a lady who dumps out her purse all over the counter to find things. Several people have bulky wallets that are full to the brim. What these people need is not a Slim Clip, but a seminar on organization. A new trend in selling you things lately is showing that it can stand the blender test. Why do we need to see that everything we buy can't be destroyed by a blender? Has anyone ever had something that they bought, besides food, destroyed by a blender? I can't remember the last time I bought computer speakers and then came home to find my wife obliterating them in the blender, with her saying, " sorry honey, I guess you should have bought better speakers." So if I put my leather wallet in a blender and it got shredded does that mean that it's not worthy to hold my money? However I read a story about a young man who had the Slim Clip and he fell into a giant turbine while at work. His body was shredded to bits but the foreman was luckily able to determine who it was because his id was protected by the Slim Clip. But my favorite part of the commercial is when the guy puts cash in his slim clip and then shakes it with his fingers holding the back of it trying to make it look like the money can't fall out. Also they give you a free key chain flashlight. There is a guy at a restaurant using it to see his menu. Not that this is the funniest thing ever, but It just gets me every time I think about using a flashlight to look at my menu at a restaurant. I think I am going to start do this every time at a restaurant whether it's dark or not.

Slim Clip

Finally !!!!

I have seen this commercial for a long time now and can't get over the many things wrong with it. I don't know how many of you understand the difference between a PC and a Mac, but I am assuming you do. When the commercial starts notice that the guy is using a mac. Then also notice the girl trying to check her email is using a mac. Then the girl trying to check her email has her computer crash with the windows operating system. Wow, how did they do that! OK I know what your thinking, "so they mixed up the operating systems of a mac and a PC, big deal." You're right, not that big a deal, simple mistake. Then notice at the bottom of the screen where it says "For PC use only" So you are advertising with macs while your product only works on PC's, Brilliant! What a bunch of idiots. Also to protect people like my mother, do not visit this site to fix your computer. This site uploads the very same spyware, addware, and every other kind of virus to your computer while you are checking for these things and then makes you pay to get rid of them. It's like going to a doctor because you have a headache and the doctor says "here drink this" and it makes you even more sick. Then he charges you for the operation so he can remove the object he put in your drink. I don't know how they get away with it but they do. Remember Mom do not visit this site to speed up your computer. If you want to speed up your computer you should probably upgrade your 256 MB of RAM.!

Finally Fast

Oh Vince

Those of you who are still cutting your vegetables by hand must have a real boring life. I can't even imagine that you are wasting your time with actually preparing your meals by hand. According to Vince down below you are really in for a great time. Why are you in for a great time, because you are about to see one of my favorite infomercials. "The Slap Chop" This guy Vince also brought you the "Shamwow." I find it hilarious that he says the phrase "your going to love my nuts." Why on earth would the producer of this or the company selling it think, "Dynamite, what a line." This guy for some reason gives me the willies every time I see him. I try to picture myself at a friends house with this guy coming over and actually meeting him. I would definitely not let him around my wife. I just don't trust this guy. There is not a whole lot to say just watch it and enjoy. Oh by the way there is an audio clip of Billy Mayes saying that he hates this guy. I mean a clip of Billy Mayes yelling that he hates this guy.